expectations Archives - brianrushing.net

The tragic ISIS genocide we are reading about brings up additional questions regarding unmet expectations. When we see what our brothers and sisters are experiencing due to their faith in Jesus Christ – whether it be killing at the hands of Islamic terrorists or imprisonment such as what has happened with pastor Saeed Abedini – then it can make us wonder about the character and love of God. How can God be called good in the face of such evil atrocities taking place on this earth He created?

We aren’t the first ones to ask these questions. We find the same questions in Jesus’ day. Even John the Baptist had a season (or moment) of questioning. John had baptized Jesus. He had called Him “The Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world.” He said about Jesus – He must become greater and I must become less. He had great expectations regarding his cousin who He had baptized as the Christ, as the Expected One, as the Lamb of God. He had seen the Holy Spirit descend onto Jesus. He knew who Jesus was and was expecting great things from Jesus. But where did he find himself? He was sitting in a jail cell awaiting possible execution. This was not what he expected!

How could the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world be Jesus if he (John) was sitting in a jail cell? Why is this happening? God, where are You?

Have you ever felt like that? Have you ever questioned God about what life has thrown at you and wondered if God was still sitting on His throne? Wondered if God was still in control? Wondered if God even cared about you? John had these same concerns.

I’m so glad that Jesus didn’t chastise him for his questions. Instead, Jesus knew just what to say to John to comfort him and to help him realize that he had done exactly what God wanted him to do. “John, I am the Messiah. My works and the scriptures prove it. You were right in calling me the Lamb of God. You can be at peace that you lived out your calling to God just as He desired for you to do.”

That brings us back to us. When we are questioning our life circumstances, many of us get discouraged about the life we have versus the one we expected. I’m sure that some of the people in the midst of these on-going persecutions are experiencing the same thoughts, concerns, and doubts.

Jesus spoke words of comfort to John. But what can He say to us who are weary and discouraged by our circumstances? He doesn’t chastise us either – rather He simply says: “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 “For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

God knew we would become weary, distressed, disappointed, frustrated, and unable to see a light at the end of the tunnel. He knew that many of our expectations for our lives would not be met and that these unmet expectations would put us into a tailspin. He never said this life would be easy – it is full of evil that we have invited into His perfect world. But instead of leaving us to deal with it on our own, He brings us into a relationship with Him so that He will walk with us in the midst of the messes we have made.

Jesus said “my yoke is easy and my burden is light,” He never said there wouldn’t be a yoke or burden. But He did leave us with the great news that if we will choose to have a relationship with Him, then even when life may not be as we expected, we can still learn peace and contentment with Him – no matter the circumstances.

And pray for those in the midst of real persecution to feel the comfort of His love as He walks with them through the evils of this world.

My Unmet Expectations

There are times when we have “great expectations,” but when the expected event arrived, the reality was much different. For example,

I remember the joy of getting my driver’s license – I had GREAT expectations. Expectations of freedom… of traveling all over town with my friends… of going wherever I wanted to whenever I wanted. And then reality smacked me in the face, as I heard such statements as:
“Go pick up your brother from soccer practice.”
“We are out of milk. Drive over to the grocery store and pick up a gallon… and while you are there, pick up some bread, and some cereal, and also a newspaper, and…

Instead of Mr. Independence, I found I’d become Errand Boy!

Or take marriage for example (don’t worry, I’m going to tread LIGHTLY here!)
But we often have an expectation of marriage that is quite different from reality.

I was told about marriage that: “You will find that you will never be as happy with another person, AND you’ll never be as angry at another person.” Most of us find this to be true. We find that our spouse can take us to both extremes easier than anyone else. Also in marriage – we have these romantic ideas, such as sleeping soundly snuggled up to our spouse. But the romantic expectation is not often the reality. In our house, we have at least two problems that prevent sleeping soundly in our bed like they show on the Sleep Number bed commercials:

#1. My wife, Paige… is a blanket stealer.
She does the grab & roll move, so that I wake up I at 4am in the morning and find myself shivering because I am having to use my pillow as a blanket.
#2. My wife, Paige… says that her husband is a snorer.
But I have never heard it, so I am not sure I believe it. Can you really trust the word of a blanket stealer?

Another Unmet Expectation that I have not experienced personally, but which I know occurs often is in regard to parenting. The expectation that OUR children will be perfect angels – unlike the wild banshee children who live next door! Before you have your own children you say such things as: “I would never let my child act like that. I can’t believe that parent is letting their child do that. I would never be a parent that does that.”

Before you become a parent, you have all the answers of how parenting works… as if it is some simple formula like 2+2 always = 4. Your expectation is that: All you have to do to parent properly is follow the formula and everything will work out fine and your children will be perfect angels. We think all these other parents are just blockheads that have decided not to follow the formula.” But then that precious baby shows up on the scene… and all our expectations are thrown out the window!

The main problem seems to be that all parents fall under the curse that their own parents put on them during childhood by stating: “When you have a child, I hope he/she is JUST LIKE YOU!” And that curse ALWAYS comes true. At which point all parenting formulas go out the window.

As one man said: “When I had no children, I had six different methods for parenting. Now I have 6 children and no methods – I just try to get through each day.”

The problem with Unmet Expectations in these areas and many others is that when our expectations are not met, doubts set in. We might even begin having doubts if we were really cut out for driving, marriage, or parenting. Why aren’t things working out like I expected them to?

Sadly, many people have their faith in God shaken when their expectations are unmet. “I’m a good person. Why is this happening to me? God can’t be a good God if this is happening.” But our unmet expectations do not negate the goodness of God. We have to learn to trust God even when our expectations are not met. Our role in this world is not to have our expectations met as if we are the stars of the story, but rather to exalt the One who is the Center of it all – the true Star of all History.

How do you keep from doubting God when reality sets in and your expectations are not met?

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